Waiting Too Long For Marriage? (우리 결혼 언제 할래요?)

At 28 and witness to real life hurdles with future plannings, sometimes I wonder if I am waiting too long for marriage. Now, age may be a defining reason for my worries, but behind that is the weighing reality that me and my boyfriend are waiting for a miracle in a sense to happen.

Since we entered into a LDR we are faced with the reality that closing the distance entails wedding bells soon after. But, each not being financially stable we have decided that whoever has the best job and best housing prospect will weigh heavily on our relocation decisions. Yet, we have been extending these decisions more lately and I am starting to worry that waiting too long to move forward will lead to missed chances & moments for us.

Choosing to Wait: Last year in mid-2015 me and my BF made the decision to wait on marriage due to our lives changing with me job-hunting and trying to progress in my career and my BF is also gaining more experience in his field. However, I’ll admit waiting for marriage and returning home helped us take the time to realize what we want not only for ourselves, but for our relationship.

Believing that we must take small steps like in the age-old  ‘the turtle and hare story’ we are nearing one year of LDR and addressing concerns with rational and thought-out decisions. Some days it seems alright to continue this ‘slow race’, however, some day’s you can’t help but question when the race will end.

cave-photo-2015
Touring Gwangmyeong Cave (located outside of Seoul), Summer 2015

Rushing In: To tell the truth I imagined that me and my boyfriend would be engaged and preparing for a 2017 wedding. The idea of a Fall wedding has been on my mind a lot more lately primarily due to the current season passing.  But, seasons do not matter too much to Koreans since weddings are planned and conducted quite diligently. However, in the U.S. wedding planning should begin at least one-year in advance to ensure the picked wedding venue location is available and guests will be able to attend.

In recent talks with the BF I have hinted what I would like for my next surprise from him. However, I would like him to woo me off my feet before asking me one of the single most important questions of my life. But, it may be asking too much since romantic proposals are not an ingrained norm among many older age Korean couples, unless directly requested or noted by the girlfriend and/ or boyfriend who will be receiving the proposal.  With all this in mind my BF has told me of some surprise waiting for me upon our next meeting, so I am anxious about what it could be.

 

 

 

 

 

*Note: All  pictures posted are owned by the Yeppunshikan author, usage of these pictures without the owners consent is strictly prohibited
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6 Comments Add yours

  1. xmoineaux says:

    Ouhh wedding talk. This all sound really exciting! I think it’s a wise choice to wait till both of you have a stable career. I’m still curious to read how your boyfriend will surprise you though

    My boyfriend has moved to my city in april and he went back to studies, so no wedding plans till 2020-is. I’ll be 30 by then. I’m sure it will be worth the wait!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. yeppunshikan says:

      You and me both 🙃 I just know that he is giving me something small and he told me that I will certainly like it. Haha, he knows wedding talk is on my mind especially since we both are nearing 30 (in Korean age 😆) But, yes, waiting until we’re both career stable is best, but we’ll see what happens in 2017. My focus is just living in the moment.

      I think that’s great your BF is studying again. It would be nice for you both to get married after all that hard work. Plus, now that you are together again there should be no pressure to marry early. That’s the same for my case, too.

      Wishing you and your BF a Merry Christmas! 🎄

      Like

  2. Suaylia says:

    I think it’s amazing and you are making a wise decision to postpone marriage for a bit!
    I think waiting is best. Don’t worry about your age. Do what you think is right for your circumstances.
    I wish you luck!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. yeppunshikan says:

    Thank you very much for the comment.

    Like

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